Well, let me give you the scientific explanation. Basic science states that neither matter or energy can be created or destroyed. So, before the very first Big Bang (some physicists explain that there was more than one) what created the first matter and energy to create the singularity that exploded to created the very first universe? They couldn't just pop into existence by themselves from nothing. Something created them. There would be no physical existence if they were not created. What could have existed to create them? That only leaves God. God is not necessarily as you have heard. God is the author of all science. Physicists are coming to the point that they will soon see the reality of God. Some already do.

Then, physicians and other medical people who attend to the dying have stated over and over for many decades that when someone dies, they leave their bodies, travel through a tunnel and come to the light. The light is God. This happens all over the world and has been written down by numerous religious people for millennia. Look up the Tibetan Book of the Dead. Again, God is not as you have heard but God does exist.

The worst thing that you have seen or been told is that God is hateful, jealous or revengeful. Not true, God is pure love. There is no way to explain the powerful love that you feel when you meet God. I can only say that it is like a thousand bolts of lightning but pure love instead of electricity. God knows you intimately and loves you as you are. The other viewpoint comes from men who were very mistaken. God even understands you being an atheist. I was an atheist for my first forty years before God came to me and showed me His/Her/It's reality. Now, I reach out because I want others to experience the love that I experience with God but that is entirely up to you. My son is a devout atheist and I get that.